above the point

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youshucc

there is a sentence in the Godfather:

"softness without boundaries will only make the other party gain an inch; kindness without principles will only let the other party do as he pleases."

those who are soft-hearted will suffer more and swallow more grievances;

for those who are soft-hearted, it is others who succeed, and those who are aggrieved are themselves.

as the old saying goes, "bullying the soft is afraid of the hard."

the weaker you are, the more others advance, and the more hurt you will be.

soft-hearted people should be ruthless, especially to the following kinds of people:

people who fail their feelings

Yan Jidao wrote in his Qingping Music:

. I can't wake up like a dream. They all regard the old days as unlucky, as long as today is ruthless. "

in Jin Fan Family, Jin Yanxi is a rich son, rich and powerful, while Leng Qingqiu is a poor student, virtuous and virtuous.

accustomed to seeing the delicate and beautiful woman around her, occasionally seeing a beautiful and refined lily, she felt different. Jin Yanxi fell in love with her when she saw Leng Qingqiu for the first time, so she launched a fierce pursuit.

find a way to get into her school as a teacher, get close to her, send shoes and socks to create romance, rent the house next door to her, and open a poetry club to win favor.

Leng Qingqiu saw his sincerity in this "great show of love" and accepted the feeling.

two people break down class boundaries and share their views on life and marriage. Even if there are differences, but also love passionately.

I thought the rest of my life would be sweet and happy, but it's a pity that autumn still can't change this dude. Although Yanxi loved her, she loved herself more, and finally failed Qingqiu.

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newlyweds, Jin Yanxi stayed out all night many times and played cards with his friends all night, so he stayed up late waiting for him.

her mother-in-law blamed Yanxi for being more and more unruly, and Qing Qiu said nice things for him, saying that her husband had many friends outside, and it was hard to lose face when she got home.

Jin Yanxi is used to living an unrestrained and undisciplined life; even if the two of them are short of money, Jin Yanxi will still tip others when they go out, and the amount is very large.

this made Qingqiu very angry and felt that he did not think about the small family at all, but her husband had always been a face-saving man. For this reason, Qingqiu just shook his head.

in the later period, the father of the Jin family died, the family began to decline, and the small family of Yanxi could not support it any longer.

Jin Yanxi, who had never worked before, began to curry favor with her ex-girlfriend Bai Xiuzhu, because she could continue to live a rich and prosperous life on her own.

when Qingqiu knew about this, she was very angry, but Jin Yanxi explained that Bai Xiuzhu could help her find a job, and now was the time when their little family was short of money.

after listening to the explanation, Qingqiu had no choice but to add a little softness and promised to let them continue to get in touch.

Jin Yanxi meets Bai Hsiu-chu more often, cares less and less about his wife and children, and thinks more about himself every day.

Qingqiu, who realized the truth, hopelessly took his son out of the house and went out to make a living on his own.

Li Bai said in "grievances":

"the beauty rolled up the bead curtain and waited, sitting and locking her eyebrows tightly. I only saw that her cheeks were wet with tears. I didn't know if she hated others or herself. "

A soft-hearted person in a relationship will be the one who is the most aggrieved and will take care of himself for the sake of the feelings of others.

A good relationship is not one-sided accommodation and tolerance, and retrogression cannot be exchanged for an unrepentant lover.

in the face of two people who are not suitable, let go even if you are sad. This is the way to stop the loss of your relationship.

people who pick soft persimmons

A soft heart is like a knife. Pass it to others and stab yourself.

my friend has changed jobs recently.

but the reason for leaving this time is not because of the job, but because I can't get along with my colleagues.

Brother Zhang brought him to the company when his friend newly joined the company. At the beginning, he could not help asking him some details about his work.

for colleagues' help, friends are grateful.

after a month or two, the two become acquainted with each other and go for a cup of coffee or dinner from time to time.

but recently, when checking out, Brother Zhang would "forget" these little things again and again on the grounds that he didn't have any change in Wechat or asked him to pay for it first and then transfer money on Wechat.

at first, my friends read the early help of Brother Zhang, but they didn't take it to heart.

Brother Zhang felt even more indifferent to repeated forbearance, and sometimes even asked his friends to do things other than picking up his children and giving keys to his wife.

in the company, because of a friend's "talkative" person, other people often open their mouths and ask him for help.

this makes friends more and more tired, devotes less and less energy to work, and has been publicly denounced by leaders several times for making mistakes.

at first, because he thought of Brother Zhang's kindness, he agreed to help, but if he had no bottom line and agreed to other people's unreasonable requests, he would only leave a wound on himself.

soft-hearted people are easy to compromise, because compromise, those who "like to pinch soft persimmons" are more likely to do whatever they want.

in the face of people who are not worth it, they must be ruthless, or they will think that you dare not resist and bully you without restraint.

people who "occupy" their own interests

soft-hearted people often gain the interests of others at the expense of their own interests.

the end of the Eastern Han DynastyThe famous Battle of Chibi in 2008 was started by Sun Quan and Cao Cao for the fat meat of Jingzhou.

but the position of Liu Bei in the three Kingdoms depends on his "borrowing" from Sun Quan to Nanxun, the military important place of Jingzhou.

Sun Quan's territory was laid down by Sun Quan, but under Liu Bei's pleas once or twice, Sun Quan finally softened and gave up Nanxun to him.

for the first time, "borrow Jingzhou" Liu Bei deliberately gave Sun Quan a high hat and recommended Sun Quan to the Han Emperor Liu Xie as a general on bikes and a herd in Xuzhou.

in order to return the favor, Sun Quan recommended Liu Bei as a pastoral in Jingzhou. This is exactly what Liu Bei wants.

after taking office, Liu Bei immediately applied to Sun Quan: although I have become a Jingzhou shepherd, there is no place for my state capital Yamen. Can you set aside an open space for me in the southern county?

Sun Quan reluctantly agreed to give him a piece of land after listening to him.

the second "borrowing Jingzhou" was taken over by Lu Su after the death of Southern County Governor Zhou Yu.

Lu Su, a pro-Liu faction, advocated lending Nanxun to Liu Bei, so he explained in front of Sun Quan:

"although the general was mighty and powerful, Lord Cao was very powerful. When he first came to Jingzhou, he caressed him before the grace letter was announced. If you fuck the enemy more, you will build up the party for yourself, and you will be above the plan. "

Sun Quan listened to Lu Su's persuasion, weighed the pros and cons, and as soon as his heart softened, he lent him the "Southern County".

Liu Bei from Southern County relied on Jiangling to enter Yizhou, occupied the land of abundance and established Shuhan, and finally divided the world with Soochow and Cao Wei.

but in the later period, Sun Quan asked for Nanxun many times, and Liu Bei was unwilling to return it, and he also staged a crying scene many times. Sun Quan felt compassion after hearing this.

the old man often said, "always open your eyebrows and don't weave your heart into sideburns."

A soft-hearted man cannot defend himself against a deep-seated villain, and an honest man is not a deep villain.

in the face of such a person, you must not have the slightest softness, or else you will lose your own interests.

be hard on yourself

someone on the Internet asked: how do you treat the character of being soft?

A netizen replied: I used to feel soft-hearted and kind-hearted, but now I feel that being soft-hearted and making mistakes again and again is harmful to others as well as to myself.

to be soft on yourself is sometimes lazy; to be soft on others is to give them another chance to hurt themselves.

because the reason for a lot of injuries is that he was born this way, and once your bottom line is broken, only for the first time and countless times.

so ruthlessness is the real sense of "softness" to yourself.

in addition to being cruel to others, you have to be ruthless to yourself in order to make yourself better.

be hard on your timid self

there is a classic line in the movie Green Book: there are too many lonely people in the world who are afraid to take the first step.

actor Yang Di mentioned his father in a program, saying that his father's friends always send text messages to his father, either ask his father to arrange to go out to play, or directly call to say that he is in urgent need of money, ask his father for help, and so on.

Father can't pretend not to see. After all, he can always be contacted by a wide range of social software, and his father can't open his mouth to refuse, so he is very upset.

when you interact with others, you are embarrassing yourself by not daring to refuse others. Let others like, in turn to add to their own jam.

be mean to yourself who is too comfortable

as a famous coffee chain, Starbucks can not achieve what it is today without the "ruthlessness" of its founders.

after graduating from Northern Michigan University as a young man, Schultz joined the then famous Xerox based in New York. Because of his excellent performance, many companies poached him.

even if you change jobs to the next company, it will take only ten months to achieve the position of general manager.

but he was unwilling to the status quo and felt that the environment was too comfortable.

this is the story of joining Starbucks later, acquiring Starbucks and growing Starbucks.

as Ma Boyong said, "beyond the comfort zone, there is a larger comfort zone."

warm water will make people do not want to make progress. If you want to break through, you must see new things.

be cruel to yourself who compromises

A news broke online earlier: a married woman, who suffered domestic violence from her husband for a long time after marriage, initially endured concessions because she wanted to keep her family intact.

after making concessions again and again, her husband was still unrepentant, and she was very disappointed that she applied for divorce.

after the divorce, who thought that he had escaped the painful days, who thought that her husband had been entangling constantly, either kneeling down to make amends for her, or pulling the children to get back together.

because he wanted his child to have a complete home, he agreed to remarry for a moment of weakness.

but the husband's original repentance is temporary. After his remarriage, his true face was revealed, and the domestic violence intensified.

for the sake of her child, the mother has been in an endless cycle of calling the police, being persuaded and compromising herself.

long-term compromise and sacrifice can not lead to a happy life. In the face of endless pain, only when you become ruthless and jump out bravely can you get a new life.

▽

people who are soft-hearted should learn the "outer circle and inner square". Circle is the way to deal with the world, and they are round and skillful to get along with others.

there is no need to be soft on those who are not worth it, and there is no need to be patient with grievances.

learn to be ruthlessNo matter to yourself or to others, the world is much more ruthless than you think.

when it's time to show your principles, don't be afraid to offend people, or they will think you have no bottom line.

, may all soft-hearted people have a "hard heart".

words.