A good relationship has its own sense of proportion.
Insight
Lao Wu, a self-media man, told a story.
Lao Wu's young man had a house in his hometown, which was later demolished and assigned to a new house.
because he has already bought a house in the city, the new house is idle and wants to sell it when he is young.
soon after the news of selling the house was released, a young friend contacted him and wanted to buy a house.
with regard to the old love, he offered a very favorable price to his friend, but there was a condition that he had to pay it all at once, and the friend gladly agreed.
but a few days later, my friend contacted and posted a novel. I couldn't find so much money all of a sudden, or I'd like to give him a change.
had already given the lowest price, but as a result, I had to erase the change. Although I was a little embarrassed, I finally said yes.
A few days after the result, a friend contacted to send a novel. If he made an one-time payment, he didn't have so much money and needed a loan.
the loan will generate interest. Can you make small payments in installments so that you don't need a loan and save interest?
when he was young, he couldn't stand it. He said angrily on the spot, "I won't sell you the house."
later, Fa Xiao sold the house through an intermediary, and the transaction price was much higher than that originally given to friends.
and the relationship between Xiao Fa and this friend has come to an abrupt end since then, and there is no more intersection.
A friend of the writer's late stand resigned and opened a store. after opening the shop, in order to take care of his friend's business, he not only went to patronize the evening stand himself, but also took his friends with him several times.
on the day my friend opened the shop, the evening stand also posted advertisements and publicity for his friends in the moments.
she thinks she has done a good job in helping her friends open a shop.
but in the eyes of her friends, she seems to have done far enough, and almost every time she meets, she still asks for an evening stand to introduce her business.
at the beginning of the evening stand, I will bravely say yes, but more times, it is inevitable that I am a little impatient, occasionally euphemistically saying that I am busy, hoping that my friends can understand the subtext behind it.
but the friend said disapprovingly, "I'm not in a hurry. Help me when you're not busy."
the late love affair is hindered by the step-by-step concession of affection, but the friend gets worse and explodes indiscriminately.
later, the endless evening stand began to alienate this friend, and slowly, the two were completely disconnected.
Why tell these two stories?
because after seeing too many clutches, I gradually understand a truth:
all relationships begin to fade, starting with overdrafts.
because I have a good relationship with a friend, I ask him for help again and again and trouble him, even if it is a trivial thing every time, but over time, my friend will inevitably choose to run away.
I always feel that it is the partner's responsibility to do housework and take care of the elderly and children. I feel at ease as a shopkeeper. My partner pays all the year round and gradually loses confidence in marriage.
relying on parents' boundless tolerance, when they are angry, they always say something indiscriminately and constantly get it from their parents, which gradually chills their hearts.
as Cai Kangyong said:
"there is an emotional account between people. Every time you make each other happy, you save a little more, and every time you make the other person sad, you save less."
all feelings have a quota, so don't squander it willfully.
when your savings account becomes zero, it's time for the other person to leave.
there is never a shortcut to the maintenance of any relationship, only management.
the better the relationship, the more you should pay attention to each other instead of overdrawing easily.
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on the stage of the Spring Festival Gala, we can always see the old couple Cai Ming and Guo Da.
Cai Ming and Guo Da have worked together for many years, and they are also very good friends in private.
once, the two went to Tibet to take part in a public welfare performance, and the sketch was called "injection".
in previous performances, the prop was just a needle without a needle.
but this time the organizer was careless and did not pull out the needle from the needle when preparing the props.
afterwards, although Guo Da said it didn't matter, Cai Ming still felt sorry.
knowing that Guo Da likes to collect coins, Cai Ming specially bought a few coins from Tibet 140 years ago and gave them to Guo Da as an apology.
many people are puzzled and feel that the two have known each other for many years and are close friends, so there is no need for such a painstaking apology.
in response, Cai Ming said something like this:
"it is precisely because we are old friends and partners who see each other every day that we have to nip even a little bit of hatred in the bud, instead of allowing it to slowly accumulate into a big contradiction."
the greatest stupidity of people is that the better the relationship, the more unscrupulous they are in front of each other.
really smart people are reluctant to overdraw good relationships, because they all know that adult relationships are hard to come by.
in this world, there are not many people who are really good to you. If you lose one, you lose one.
there is a good saying:
"never put friendship on an incredible height. Some friends are people who bring good things to themselves at a stage, enjoy each other rather than bind each other."
A really good relationship often has its own sense of proportion.
in the entertainment industry, Huang Bo, Xu Zheng and Ning Hao are called "the most powerful iron triangle in China's film industry". The three people can maintain a deep friendship because they all know how to divide.
in 2011, Ning Hao wanted to film the Golden robbery, and Xu Zheng liked the role of the leading actor in the film.
but Ning Hao thought Xu Zheng was not suitable, so he refused Xu Zheng, and Xu Zheng never mentioned it again.
seeing that the movie is about to start, Ning Hao still did not find a suitable leading actor. At this time, Xu Zheng did not introduce himself again, but introduced Lei Jiayin to Ning Hao.
I have to say that Xu Zheng has a very good sense of size, because he knows how not to embarrass his friends.
Friendship is the same, and so is marriage.
there is an old couple in Japan. Grandpa is meticulous and planned, but Grandma is a little careless.
the two people have very different personalities, but they have been in love all their lives. The secret of happiness is actually very simple: "intimate discretion".
Grandpa doesn't like vegetables, and Grandma never forces him to eat them "for his own good".
Grandma wants to buy anything, Grandpa doesn't stop her, as long as she's happy.
especially like the sentence: "We need intimacy, but we don't need interference." We need warmth, but we don't need baking. "
there is a limit to everything. Once you cross the line, you will feel tired to each other, and you will have a grudge against each other over time.
keep a sense of limits, don't ask too much, don't ask too much, get along comfortably, so that you can never get tired of being with each other for a long time.
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finally, I would like to share with you a paragraph:
"A good interpersonal relationship is like a tree, usually nothing to water, take care of, occasionally can see a few beautiful flowers, pleasing to the eye, enough.
if you are lucky, it is even more fortunate to bear a few fruits and share the sweetness of life together. "
remember, never overdraw your relationship with anyone.
, live up to every feeling for the rest of your life, and may your heart not be disappointed.