above the point

Marriage is a major event in a lifetime, and who you marry is directly related to a person's happiness index for the rest of his life.

people often say that "marriage depends on family circumstances" and "marriage is a perfect match." it seems to be an old idea, but in fact it makes sense.

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before marriage, through the family situation of your partner, you can see the possible problems in life after marriage.

as a parent, you must tell your child:

to get married, try to find these three families.

A well-matched family

in the popular TV series "Golden years" some time ago, the heroine Jiang Nansun was born with a golden spoon in a wealthy family.

and his first boyfriend, Zhang Anren, although tall, handsome and talented, is a Phoenix man from a poor family.

all Chiang Nan-sun wants is love. She was pampered from an early age, and her family is not short of money, so she doesn't care about Zhang Anren's family situation.

but father Chiang disagreed that his daughter was with someone who was not in the right house.

in a fit of anger, Jiang Nansun did not hesitate to cut off his long hair and destroy the precious violin, so as to resist his father.

in Jiang Nansun's heart, love is paramount, and the rest doesn't care. She disobeyed her parents and chose to be with Zhang Anren without hesitation.

but this kind of love was quickly broken by reality, and with Jiang Nansun's father going bankrupt, Zhang Anren also exposed the mentality of the Phoenix man living cautiously.

when Jiang Nansun's family had an accident, everyone was helping her, but Zhang Anren, a nominal boyfriend, shunned it. She even refused to lend her father a house for fear that it would affect her reputation and life.

the love between Jiang Nansun and Zhang Anren is like an unexpected encounter between a princess and a poor scholar. After a beautiful romance, all the gory realities are in front of us, and the two are doomed to go their separate ways and cannot go to the end.

looking at the ending of Jiang Nansun and Zhang Anren, I couldn't help thinking of Zhu Suosuo's words when she advised her to seriously consider marrying Zhang Anren.

"when you are in love, you are poor, strange, weak and hesitant, cold and proud. These all seem to be distinctive advantages.

but once you live together, not necessarily. "

Women cannot marry, not because they are vain, but because they have an unbalanced state of mind.

there are always people who think that they are full of love and that the magic of love is infinite.

but love is not so indestructible, much less perfect.

Jane Austen said: "in marriage, it is absurd to think only about family means; it is foolish not to think about family means."

never overestimate love, different family conditions, differences in the concept of life, over a long period of time, will become the catalyst for the breakdown of marriage.

A truly happy marriage must be matched and evenly matched.

so please tell your children to look at each other's family before getting married.

families where parents love each other

Xiao Hui and A Wen met on a blind date. Half a year after the date, they agreed to A Wen's proposal of marriage.

the friends around her, including her parents, thought Xiaohui was too hasty and advised her to think more about it.

Hsiao Hui is unmoved and believes that Arvin is a good match for her.

Why does Xiaohui have so much confidence in Ah Wen?

it turns out that on the blind date day, when Xiaohui was invited by Arvin to his house for dinner, she found that Arvin's father picked up food for his mother from time to time, and would carefully remove the fishbone and peel the shrimp.

immediately after dinner, he cleaned up the dishes and let his mother rest.

at first, Xiao Hui thought Ah Wen's father was just for show, but later she learned that this had always been their way of getting along.

the two have been married for 28 years, and they are as sweet as ever. One often cooks, while the other cuts vegetables and cooperates with each other.

at this age, they still walk hand in hand and go shopping like little lovers.

having been married for so many years, he seldom has a red face in disputes, and he is what everyone calls a model couple.

Xiao Hui said that she was full of confidence in this relationship and firmly believed that A Wen, who grew up in such a family, would love himself as much as his father did to his mother, so that she could live an ideal marriage life.

facts have proved that there is nothing wrong with Xiaohui's choice. Ah Wen has always been very kind to Xiaohui, understanding her, loving her, and giving priority to her in everything.

psychologist Satya said:

"A person is inextricably linked to his original family, and the mode of parents getting along is the mode of children's learning."

you can see what the future marriage will look like from the way parents get along with each other in a family.

imagine that if parents are at odds with each other, they will often quarrel and abuse. For a child who has lived in this kind of family for a long time, how can his views on love and marriage not be affected.

parents fall in love, which is the best style of a family.

so please tell your children to visit each other's house before getting married.

see how his parents get along. If they are in love, they can be considered together.

if your parents have a lot of conflicts, you must be careful.

after all, marriage is a major event in life and should not be careless at all.

families with the same values

there is a hot question on Zhihu:

is at odds with his boyfriend's family, customs and values are quite different. Should they get married?

one of the answers is: if it affects the relationship between the two, don't get married. The three values are the bottom line. It is recommended to be cautious.

friend tea and teaThe family conditions of the two boyfriends are similar, so they are a good match. They have a good relationship and had planned to get engaged at the end of the year. But some time ago, Cha Cha broke up.

Tea parents are open-minded and kind. They feel that when they are together, they should understand each other, support each other, and help each other do what they can.

on the other hand, the boyfriend's mother feels that it is only natural for a woman to take care of the man, and every time she calls, she will remind Cha Cha to do housework and cook for her son every day.

the boyfriend's family extremely favors boys over girls, sweeping tombs during the Qingming Festival, and women can't attend, so they can only bring clothes to worship.

before the two were married, the boyfriend's family indicated to Tea that he gave birth to a son for the first time, not only helping with him, but also rewarding him with a reward of 100000 yuan.

Tea said: "Love is one thing, whether it is suitable for marriage or not is another." If you get married, you are going to his house to be a babysitter or a fertility machine, or not! "

the values of the two families are completely different, and even tea's parents agree that she should break up after learning about the man's family situation. Cai Yuanpei wrote in the cultivation of the Chinese people:

"A family is the school at the beginning of life. The character of a lifetime, the so-called constant change, is probably born in the family. "

is not a family, do not enter a door. What kind of parents, what kind of children.

Family atmosphere has a great influence on children.

because parents are the first teachers of their children, they will directly affect their children's character.

if the parents in a family are people with enlightened, quality and positive values, then their children will not be so bad.

if, like the parents of a tea boyfriend, prefer sons over daughters, they want to help their son take care of everything, have a strong desire for possession, and do not allow his son to disobey at all.

growing up in such a family, people will probably become selfish, cowardly, do not know how to respect and love women, and have no awe for marriage.

what is marriage most afraid of?

I am most afraid of different values and habits.

only two families that are similar can be better integrated. Those who are too far apart will only be beaten by flying eggs, and will eventually lead a life.

so, if your child wants to get married, be sure to find a family with the same values.

Marriage is a very serious matter, entering a marriage, in addition to love, but also depends on whether it is suitable or not.

families with different values really cannot get married.

Wu Zhihong, a psychological counselor, said in Why Family hurts people:

"Love is constantly passed on in this cycle, from our original families to our newborn families.

the way we get along with our lovers is also repeating the way we get along with our parents. "

Happy people repeat happiness, while miserable people repeat pain.

if you don't take a good look at each other's family and get married casually before marriage, you are likely to end up in failure.

Liu Tong said: "at first glance, it is just a favor. Whether two people can come together and continue to walk, it is more important to see whether the gears of the two hearts are in tune."

Marriage, the right two people, two equal families, can join hands to reach the other side of happiness.

, as a parent, please tell your children to find these three families as much as possible when they get married:

being a good match is not an old idea, it is the guarantee of happiness;

the example of parental love will be extended to the next generation.

only two people who come from a family with the same values can have the same soul.

"when you are in love, you are poor, strange, weak and hesitant, cold and proud. These all seem to be distinctive advantages.

but once you live together, not necessarily. "

Women cannot marry, not because they are vain, but because they have an unbalanced state of mind.

there are always people who think that they are full of love and that the magic of love is infinite.

but love is not so indestructible, much less perfect.

Jane Austen said: "in marriage, it is absurd to think only about family means; it is foolish not to think about family means."

never overestimate love, different family conditions, differences in the concept of life, over a long period of time, will become the catalyst for the breakdown of marriage.

A truly happy marriage must be matched and evenly matched.

so please tell your children to look at each other's family before getting married.

families where parents love each other

Xiao Hui and A Wen met on a blind date. Half a year after the date, they agreed to A Wen's proposal of marriage.

the friends around her, including her parents, thought Xiaohui was too hasty and advised her to think more about it.

Hsiao Hui is unmoved and believes that Arvin is a good match for her.

Why does Xiaohui have so much confidence in Ah Wen?

it turns out that on the blind date day, when Xiaohui was invited by Arvin to his house for dinner, she found that Arvin's father picked up food for his mother from time to time, and would carefully remove the fishbone and peel the shrimp.

immediately after dinner, he cleaned up the dishes and let his mother rest.

at first, Xiao Hui thought Ah Wen's father was just for show, but later she learned that this had always been their way of getting along.

the two have been married for 28 years, and they are as sweet as ever. One often cooks, while the other cuts vegetables and cooperates with each other.

at this age, they still walk hand in hand and go shopping like little lovers.

having been married for so many years, he seldom has a red face in disputes, and he is what everyone calls a model couple.

Xiao Hui said that she was full of confidence in this relationship and firmly believed that A Wen, who grew up in such a family, would love himself as much as his father did to his mother, so that she could live an ideal marriage life.

facts have proved that there is nothing wrong with Xiaohui's choice. Ah Wen has always been very kind to Xiaohui, understanding her, loving her, and giving priority to her in everything.

psychologist Satya said:

"A person is inextricably linked to his original family, and the mode of parents getting along is the mode of children's learning."

you can see what the future marriage will look like from the way parents get along with each other in a family.

imagine that if parents are at odds with each other, they will often quarrel and abuse. For a child who has lived in this kind of family for a long time, how can his views on love and marriage not be affected.

parents fall in love, which is the best style of a family.

so please tell your children to visit each other's house before getting married.

see how his parents get along. If they are in love, they can be considered together.

if your parents have a lot of conflicts, you must be careful.

after all, marriage is a major event in life and should not be careless at all.

families with the same values

there is a hot question on Zhihu:

is at odds with his boyfriend's family, customs and values are quite different. Should they get married?

one of the answers is: if it affects the relationship between the two, don't get married. The three values are the bottom line. It is recommended to be cautious.

friend tea and teaThe family conditions of the two boyfriends are similar, so they are a good match. They have a good relationship and had planned to get engaged at the end of the year. But some time ago, Cha Cha broke up.

Tea parents are open-minded and kind. They feel that when they are together, they should understand each other, support each other, and help each other do what they can.

on the other hand, the boyfriend's mother feels that it is only natural for a woman to take care of the man, and every time she calls, she will remind Cha Cha to do housework and cook for her son every day.

the boyfriend's family extremely favors boys over girls, sweeping tombs during the Qingming Festival, and women can't attend, so they can only bring clothes to worship.

before the two were married, the boyfriend's family indicated to Tea that he gave birth to a son for the first time, not only helping with him, but also rewarding him with a reward of 100000 yuan.

Tea said: "Love is one thing, whether it is suitable for marriage or not is another." If you get married, you are going to his house to be a babysitter or a fertility machine, or not! "

the values of the two families are completely different, and even tea's parents agree that she should break up after learning about the man's family situation. Cai Yuanpei wrote in the cultivation of the Chinese people:

"A family is the school at the beginning of life. The character of a lifetime, the so-called constant change, is probably born in the family. "

is not a family, do not enter a door. What kind of parents, what kind of children.

Family atmosphere has a great influence on children.

because parents are the first teachers of their children, they will directly affect their children's character.

if the parents in a family are people with enlightened, quality and positive values, then their children will not be so bad.

if, like the parents of a tea boyfriend, prefer sons over daughters, they want to help their son take care of everything, have a strong desire for possession, and do not allow his son to disobey at all.

growing up in such a family, people will probably become selfish, cowardly, do not know how to respect and love women, and have no awe for marriage.

what is marriage most afraid of?

I am most afraid of different values and habits.

only two families that are similar can be better integrated. Those who are too far apart will only be beaten by flying eggs, and will eventually lead a life.

so, if your child wants to get married, be sure to find a family with the same values.

Marriage is a very serious matter, entering a marriage, in addition to love, but also depends on whether it is suitable or not.

families with different values really cannot get married.

Wu Zhihong, a psychological counselor, said in Why Family hurts people:

"Love is constantly passed on in this cycle, from our original families to our newborn families.

the way we get along with our lovers is also repeating the way we get along with our parents. "

Happy people repeat happiness, while miserable people repeat pain.

if you don't take a good look at each other's family and get married casually before marriage, you are likely to end up in failure.

Liu Tong said: "at first glance, it is just a favor. Whether two people can come together and continue to walk, it is more important to see whether the gears of the two hearts are in tune."

Marriage, the right two people, two equal families, can join hands to reach the other side of happiness.

, as a parent, please tell your children to find these three families as much as possible when they get married:

being a good match is not an old idea, it is the guarantee of happiness;

the example of parental love will be extended to the next generation.

only two people who come from a family with the same values can have the same soul.