Zeng Guofan once said:

"choosing friends is the most important thing in life."

indeed, choosing friends is the most important thing in life.

as the saying goes, a good friend is like a ladder, which helps you to be reasonable; a bad friend is like a knife, and you will be doomed forever.

what kind of people we associate with has a direct impact on our lives.

if you meet someone who often says the following three things, don't make a deep acquaintance, be sure to stay away.

pessimistic and negative words

it is said that each of us has an energy field that affects and shifts from one another to another.

when you get along with positive people, you will feel their positivity and become optimistic and cheerful.

people with negative energy, on the other hand, will unwittingly exude pessimism, slowly affect the mood of the people around them, and make other people's lives bleak.

A few days ago, my friend Xiaoxiao told me that she had blocked a colleague's circle of friends.

when asked why, Xiaoxiao said that the colleague had a good relationship with her and was warm, but his personality was too negative.

every time the boss arranges a job, her colleagues feel that they have the heaviest task, and everyone is targeting her.

as a result, he complained in the office all day, but made no progress in his work.

she usually likes to post on moments, updating four or five posts a day, full of negative energy.

for example, early in the morning: "it's another day of mourning. I don't want to do anything."

when you go shopping for clothes, you will say, "you don't look good in anything. Fat people are really not fit to go out."

when I walked, I sprained my ankle and complained, "nothing goes well. It's too difficult to be a man."

every time Xiaoxiao clicks on Wechat, she will be brushed by her bad mood and finally can't stand it.

writer Li Shanglong said:

"negative energy is whipping others bad and scolding social injustice; positive energy is telling you that no matter how bitter it is, I can still try to change something."

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so it really matters who you are with.

when you are with diligent people, you will not be lazy; with positive people, you will not be depressed.

if you are with people who are full of negative energy, you will only become more and more decadent and mediocre.

I advise you to draw a line with pessimists as soon as possible, no matter what the relationship is.

words that are inconsistent

is there such a person around you:

when I accompany you to buy clothes, I say it suits you very well, but privately I discuss with others that the color is very tacky.

when you work together to finish a job, he says that you all work together, but secretly he says that all the credit depends on yourself.

call you a brother when you need help, but if you ask for something, you won't be close enough.

the most terrible thing about dealing with people is to meet inconsistent people who put you in danger and make you grateful at the same time.

Wang Xifeng in the classic A Dream of Red Mansions is such an inconsistent and double-faced person.

when Wang Xifeng learned that Jia Lian had a secret song style with second Sister you, she was ebullient on the surface, booed and greeted second Sister you, and took her to live in her own home.

after second Sister you let her guard down and moved into the garden, she was doing bad things behind her back.

finally forced second Sister you to have a miscarriage, swallow gold and die, and the two lives ended one after another.

as the old saying goes:

"people with inconsistent attitudes are bound to be not pure and good people."

they do it face to face and behind their backs, deceiving their hearts with false feelings and calculating their true feelings with false pretences.

when dealing with this kind of person, even if you give all your heart and heart, you will not be able to touch his heart or hear what he really thinks. He will only be deceived by the other party again and again and bear numerous blows.

when you choose someone to make friends, you must keep your eyes open, or it will be too late to repent.

words of extreme paranoia

A netizen once shared a story.

his friend is a young man of literature and art, who likes poetry, calligraphy and painting very much.

once, when he and his friend went to a bookstore and saw the pen and ink related to calligraphy and painting, his friend thought it was very elegant, so he bought some and encouraged netizens to buy it together.

and netizens are not interested in these, so they say they don't like them.

after a few days, netizens clashed with their friends because of a point of view that had nothing to do with right and wrong, and the friend began to find a lot of evidence, constantly trying to refute him, which finally made netizens embarrassed and disgusted.

sometimes, we will inevitably meet such self-centered people.

if I like tea, I think people who like Coke are boring; if I like light music, I think people who love rock and roll are vulgar.

however, there has never been a unified standard in this world, and everyone has their own ideas and perspectives on problems, and it is the self-consciousness of an adult to know how to respect the differences of others.

Bi Shumin once said:

"gentleness is sometimes more powerful than storms."

the most important thing in dealing with people is to deal with problems dialectically, to understand others peacefully, and to make people feel like a spring breeze, rather than taking themselves as the model, dealing with others tit-for-tat and making them uncomfortable.

when you get along with paranoid people, you will never feel the pleasure of making friends. You can only make endless judgments about right and wrong.

people's energy is limited, instead of alwaysIf you are questioned or opposed, you might as well find someone who can understand you to be friendly with each other.

▽

as the old saying goes, "know people, know faces, not hearts."

in life, everyone wears a mask, no one can see through a person at a glance, all need to get to know each other in a long period of communication.

to judge whether a person can be a friend, not only by his appearance and talent, but more importantly by listening to him.

words are the voice of the heart, words are the state of mind, and language can best expose a person's character.

when you meet people who are pessimistic, negative, inconsistent, paranoid and extreme, you must stay away and don't get to know each other deeply.

the darker the heart is, the more distorted the personality is and the more likely it is to hurt people in the invisible.

time flies and life is short. Please spend your precious time on people who are worth it.

May you and I warm our hearts to the sunshine and meet all the good people for the rest of our lives.

, good night.