there is a good saying:

you can never wake up someone who pretends to be asleep.

once upon a time, we always wanted to let others adapt to us.

when I walk, I find that it is not as easy to change myself as I always want to change others.

change others, always focus on others, care too much about other people's opinions, and you must be exhausted in the end.

Why care what other people think of you?

you just need to be yourself, and those who have misunderstandings about you will slowly unravel it.

those who like you with all their heart will get closer to you.

you don't have to think about changing people all the time. After all, you can't wake someone who pretends to be asleep.

all the troubles

all stems from high expectations of people

there is such a problem in Zhihu:

Why is it that the more you care about a relationship, the more cold you feel?

one of the answers goes like this,

because the more you care and expect too much, when you know more and more about the other person, the gap between the other person and your imagination will widen, and your heart will be chilled by disappointment.

Ma de said: I have come to understand why I am not happy, because I am always looking forward to a result.

A person who is indifferent to you, no matter how kind you are to him, he may not be warm to you;

people who look down on you, no matter how much you show, they may not change their minds.

in a relationship, the more you care, the more tired you are, and the more nervous you are, the more tired you are.

instead of always thinking about changing others and turning others to adapt to themselves, it is better to be yourself and let fate come and go freely.

what belongs to you will stay for you; if it does not belong to you, it will never stay!

find a reason for everything from yourself

Don't take yourself too seriously, and you won't be disappointed because the other person thinks less of you.

Don't take yourself too lightly, and you won't be aggrieved by being too careful.

between people, be yourself, be sincere, be reliable, as to whether you can go to the end, what he thinks of you is not important at all.

the right person is always around you, and the wrong person is always shoulder to shoulder with you.

some people don't like you, some people leave you, some people don't have you in their hearts. Don't question him, why!

if you find more reasons for yourself, if you are magnanimous, you will have a clear conscience; if you put your heart into it, you will feel at ease; if you give, you will not regret it.

Don't look for other people's reasons. You don't like others because you are not broad-minded.

Don't find others to miss, be hurt by others, because you expect too much!

find your own reasons, you can broaden the pattern, you can grow stronger, and you can become strong!

blame others to ask yourself first, forgive yourself first.

reduce the requirements of others, you can live at ease; less guess about other people's psychology, you can live a good life!

instead of complaining, change

what is there to complain about?

are we so fragile that if others don't care about us, we will never recover?

Life, how much wind and rain hit, how many ups and downs to go, do not be swayed by other people's emotions, do not hurt yourself because of other people's dislike.

instead of blindly complaining and making people feel verbose, it is better to be yourself and make yourself stronger.

improve yourself, you will become more and more confident, far happier than being careful to please others!

what kind of person do you want to be in this life, work hard in that direction. Persevere, don't slack off; forge ahead, don't be negative; persevere, don't give up!

even if you can't get what you want in the end, you will become stronger, more optimistic, more and more free and easy!

Life is a process of constantly tempering yourself!

if you let go, happiness will always be there; if you are well, it will be sunny; if you are at ease, the breeze will come slowly!

remember, just be yourself, there is no need to change others!